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Cannibals and Corpses (No, it’s not a Roleplaying game, or a band. It’s real!)

3 Apr
Cannibalism, Brazil. Engraving by Theodor de B...

Cannibalism, Brazil. Engraving by Theodor de Bry for Hans Staden’s account of his 1557 captivity. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Following on from this weeks finale in The Walking Dead, what with their suspected terminus cannibal types, I thought I’d take it upon myself to guide you to a few choice real world tales of flesh munchers and cadavers.

On the theme of people eaters, that being cannibals to me and you, firstly I want to show you the recent report of what has been dubbed the cannibal cafe. You won’t see Gordon Ramsey or Jamie Oliver here, but what you will see is human head on the menu (and I don’t mean the customers getting a BJ, it’s real human head!) The funny thing is that it seems like they did have customers, so it makes you wonder how widespread cannibalism is in the world. Sure, it’s certainly taboo, it would be naive to think it doesn’t happen anymore after thousands of years of human evolution, peppered with all sorts of human munching for various reasons of cuture, nessesity and madness.

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/africa/cannibal-restaurant-with-roasted-human-heads-on-the-menu-shut-down-by-police-9123693.html

The next bit of cannibal craziness is a most definitely 21st century spin on the theme, and some would even argue that this is even actually cannibalism (which in my opinion it is) This company hopes to take samples from the famous and then lab grow their meat to be eaten by others! I can’t see this being cheap since with the recent lab grown meat experiments costing a whole stack of cash, add on the cost of obtaining the original samples of the subjects, then the real costs of doing the do, then the hype and nonsense, then the cannibal costs (the privilage of eating long pig etc) then I surmise, this isn’t something you’ll just be able to get on the way back from the pub on a weekend like the humble dona kebab, and you’d have to be among the elite to afford it.

“It’s made out of people!” Making meat from celebrity tissue samples.

Of corpses, or not corpses (well, he is now anyway) with the story of the guy who was suspected dead, and woke up in a morgue. Well, two weeks after the incident, he died! It makes you wonder why he actually bothered, unless he’s going to wake up again in another two weeks and this is going to be a regular thing. I feel sorry for his family, it’s going to cost them a shit load in funerals!

http://www.clarionledger.com/article/20140313/NEWS/303130055/Miss-man-who-woke-up-body-bag-two-weeks-ago-dies?gcheck=1&nclick_check=1

More corpses, and the news that it seems likely that the infamous Black death was not as it was thought, spread by rat fleas, but it was airbourne. If you remember the old rhyme, ring O roses, “atichoo, atichoo, we all fall down” seems to be in line with some sort of flu type of strain and not infection from flea bites. Since when do you sneeze from getting bit by a flea? (I might be wrong, but the new synopsis seems more plausable in my opine!) What does bother me is, exhuming plague victims corpses doesn’t sound like a great idea since things like viruses, bacteria and such can lie dormant for thousands of years. Why is it a good idea to start digging up plague pits and fucking around with them? Whatever they do, the scientists can stay the fuck away from me! (and make sure they wash their hands!)

http://www.theguardian.com/science/2014/mar/29/black-death-not-spread-rat-fleas-london-plague

I’ll be back later with some recent developments in clown news…..

 

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